That Sinking Feeling

Paco fielded the call. The guy on the other end was angry and wanted to speak to the CSB. The CSB wasn't officially in. She was physically here, but thanks to some percocets that Tits Ahoy was selling her for twice street value, her mind was in it's happy place.

So Paco had to listen to the guy vent about the used waverunner he bought. The customer claims that when he put it in the water for the first time, it sank. Paco explained to the customer that used vehicles were sold 'as is,' and then passed him off to Star. Star explained that there was no guarantee a used watercraft would float, and told the customer that if he wanted anything done, he would have to speak to the CSB, but that she wasn't in, and might be in later. Paco and Star agreed that the guy was an asshole on the phone.

Then the CSB stuck her head out the door of the office door, saw her shadow, and went back to sleep.

Some nutcase has taken all the photos of the CSB off her myspace account and made a tribute site to her. He comes in and shows her the site when he makes changes, and probably lurks in the bushes outside her house at night, hoping to get a glimpse of the CSB as she staggers out of the shower and passes out on the couch.

What is it about scooters that makes them so appealing to idiots? A couple came in, and Mondo recognized them from last season, even though the wife had managed to put on about 40 fresh lbs. of winter coat. They went from scooter to scooter, putting them on their center stands, then climbing on and rocking back and forth.

Then they wanted to know what was the best scooter for them. The way to find out is to ask the salespeople lots of stupid questions. But that's pretty hard when the salespeople are sitting at the desk laughing at you as you climb on and off the scooters, almost knocking them over, and refuse to produce brochures or fetch the keys so you can see under the seat of every scooter the place carries. Another way to insure nobody wants to help you is to tell the salespeople you are looking at a used model of a brand the Lazy K doesn't carry, and that you think you can buy it for a ridiculously low price.

Mondo decided he'd had enough fun watching Mrs. Praise the Lord and her God Loves America teeshirt flopping around on the back of all the scooters, so he told the nice couple about three great models that would be perfect for them, that unfortunately aren't on our floor. Ol' Wigger told them that all three models were at the Lazy K located 60 miles away, and that we gave demo rides at this location. They're not and we don't. Mr. God Says Buy a Scooter said he doesn't have a motorcycle license. Mondo told him it is probably better if he doesn't tell the salesperson at the other Lazy K that, if he wants to ride anything.

No comments: