Smelly Ivan and the Rod of Glass

Sounds like a Harry Potter story, doesn't it?

The women of the Lazy K were milling around the counter, finishing off a couple dozen donuts that one of the radio reps had brought in. He doesn't get as much of our business as the guy who brings in dog treats and tells the CSB how hot she is, But he's an allright guy and he does get us free tickets to stuff, which Mondo sells on craigslist, then splits the take with the CSB. The Buddha had his own pile of donuts at his desk and another hidden in one of the drawers, next to the remains and wrappers of christmas candy different customers had left for the CSB.

Smelly Ivan came up to the counter and said he has something to show them. He reached into his tankbag and pulled out a glass dildo, which appeared to need a good washing. Smelly Ivan told the women of the Lazy K that he always has this dildo with him, just in case he meets a woman who wants to have wild sex. He set it on the counter and rolled it back and forth. He then decided to regale the women of the Lazy K with stories of the adventures he and the dildo had shared. Though it pained her to do so, TitsAhoy offered him a donut, in the hope that he knew the rule about not talking with food in your mouth. Smelly Ivan declined the offer, and went on to describe the things he could do to TitsAhoy with the dildo, He claimed to have several more at home.

Just when it looked like there would be no respite from the deluge of dildo stories, One of God's motorcycle riding minions came to the counter, commented on the donuts, showed the Rhino and TitsAhoy his new "What Would Jesus Ride" patch, next to the one that says "Aim for the Turban," and asked why his bike leaks oil from the valve covers ever since the Lazy K did the first service. The CSB looked up from myspace, and told the Rhino to call back to the Service department to find out what the hell is going on with Mr. Holier than thou's VTX 1800.

Smelly Ivan and his dildo went back to making bikes leak oil.

About half an hour later, the Rhino told TitsAhoy that the glass dildo felt like someone throwing a hotdog down a hallway.

1 comment:

Apparently Crazy said...

I work for the company that makes those entirely too pricey glass dildos. Well, at least one "function" of the company. It's quite interesting, to say the least, to roam through a sea of displayed dildos to do your work everyday.