As I Lay Lying

Dear Readers,

We are pleased to announce the arrival of a new writer, who wishes to remain anonymous. Last night, after the bars closed, we received the following story, sent in excerpts from about 2:15 to 4:00 AM. Makes for an interesting, if not quite compelling read, and I especially appreciate the Faulkneresque employment of stream of consciousness.

Hopefully we will receive more great stories from this person, and she will send us her email address so we can add her to our stable of writers.

Any guesses as to authorship? My bets are on Tits Ahoy, the Meal Ticket and everyone's favorite user of misspelled words, the Lovable Old CSB.

"I have to say I am getting sick of all the b/s about the CSB.SO WHAT SHE DOES PILLS!Same shit! It's getting old!Let's post something new!!!! How about.....

The CSB... She struggles with a company of total season! Yeah well who wouldn't? If you sold mosquito nets, do you really think you would make a profit in the winter? I really use to be with this BLOG, an think is was great,But now I want to make the people out there that just read the words an wait for more, maybe appreciate THE AUTHOR.

Well let me see if I can remember the story. The Buddha aka budha or budisim or whatever the fuck it is you use.He sat behind the finance desk, always having a smile on his face,never to hurt anyone.Of course what man/woman would want to hurt a soul when thier life is being ripped out of their daughter or son? Could you imagine working, knowing that one day you might get the call that the one you love is gone? NO! I honestly don't think anyone on this BLOG could understand the pain this man went through If you ask me?(which NO ONE has,thank god)I would say this man has as many values as a goverment official.He may have not laid his life on the line, took gunfire upon himself or been behind enemy lines,But this man took his only chance on a company willing to save a life.A life that he didn't ask to be given,but chose to take.You may hate the company and what its about,an who its involved with,but at who's exspense are you costing.

Let Me See If I Can Remember!!
STAR! Everyone wants to hear a story about STAR, well here it is,
When I first met star I honestly thought he was gay!BUT!!! I realized his "mojo".This guy has it,he has figured it out,an I LOVE IT!All straight women flock to a gay man asking stupid questions, that no straight man would answer. Am I fat? Do you think I'm sexy?Do you want me?WHY ARE ALL THE GOODMEN GAY???? BOOM!!! Well hello i'm not gay!Your not? NO! But you told me I was fat? Well bitch you are! But a few more, an AWWW you'll still be FAT!! But what the fuck.If your still here at the end of the night I'll call u a cab/an pay! Depending on how drunk I am.Maybe i'll take you home with me.If your cute when i'm sober!Is she cute? Ohhh fuck IT pussy is PUSSY!!!"

20 comments:

Anonymous said...

Um, what??

Anonymous said...

Is this the conversation that took place the night Star fucked the CSB and got his job?

Anonymous said...

Jim was a nice guy trying to make lemonade with the lemons he got from life. Patty treated him like total shit!!!Never giving him a raise and milking him for all he was worth!!!Jim was sick and tired of it..I think he realized along time ago how the CSB was...and did what he needed to do just to get by...Jimmy if your reading this blog I hope life is good where your at!The grass is alway's greener when you leave hell!!!

Anonymous said...

Paco is a dumbass for coming back to that shit hole.He must have no sales skills.

Anonymous said...

The next day all you heard was " I never knew Star was such a good salesman,he talked me into taking a cab home! and he rode with me so I got home safe."

Anonymous said...

The funny thing was that Star said it was nasty and all beat up but he was drunk and pussy's pussy!

Anonymous said...

Lets hear some more good stories of Star.there has to be some readers out there that know some dirt!Send your stories

Anonymous said...

Damn you weak bitches still sitting on all those GS500.I heard they are sitting on new 05 stock. Man you guys SUCK!How's them junk ass Kemco's too!!

Anonymous said...

many moons ago, there was a typical guy conversation going on in the service dept. involving women and what we would do to whose ever picture or magazine we were looking at at the time. in comes star, and i quote, "you guys are fucking sick, i would never go down on pussy." what? oh yes, star thinks this is disgusting. gay, maybe not. faggot, definately!

Anonymous said...

He told me he likes it when the CSB gave him head because he didn't like that sloppy shit.I think he just wanted to dream about a dude while she was doing it!

Anonymous said...

we sold 152 of those GS500f you dumb ass. You must be new thats how you make the real money. I'd tell but then I'd have to feed your balls to my dogs. children...good greif

Anonymous said...

Maybe you sold 152 starting way back in 06 until now but I doubt that!Speaking of money,what did the salesperson make $5.00 you company screws the whole market up with your stupied ass sales tatics.We're all waiting to see how your lawsuit goes.I hear your finance manager got the f out.Taking his name off everything he could! Hope the last lawsuit didn't clean you out,cause you got another big one coming!

Anonymous said...

I heard the F&I guy was working with the state undercover?

Anonymous said...

Ok this blog is out of control now. I haven't seen a mess like this since the Golden Coral Grand Opening that George took his wife too.

Anonymous said...

So if they have to pay back all the freight and prep charges does the salespeople that got wacked for not charging freight and prep get their money back too?

Anonymous said...

I talked to a lawyer about it and he said it is possible to get your money back.

Anonymous said...

CSB is a ex navy seal. Still undercover with the DEA

Anonymous said...

would that be Drug Eating Agency?

Anonymous said...

An elite group of highly trained pill poppers ready to snort!

Anonymous said...

My head spins....